THE SMARTEST SMOOCHER IN TOWN by Joseph Tom Riach
Sam wasn’t a good looking lad, not by any stretch. His features were more car crash than Cruise, his physique more crisis than Christiano. In terms of intellect he was not only not at the races, he got lost on his way from the stables. And in the electric personality stakes he finished plumb last, a couple of A3s short of a torch beam. So what was it about him that made him irresistable to members of the opposite sex? Just what made him the smartest smoocher in town?
To say that this question persistantly perplexed his teenage contemporaries of the time (myself included) is indeed an understatement. We just could not understand his success with the ‘birds’ and, as time passed, his never ceasing and rapidly accumulating tally of conquests only instilled in us more and more confusion … and resentment!
But when confronted and had ‘the question’ aggressively put to him (in terms less than complimentary) it quickly became obvious that he had not the slightest idea of what we were talking about. He was oblivious to the fact that he was cornering the market in amerous encounters like a De Beers diamond dealer and certainly had no cleverly conceived strategy which he deployed. Only at the point of imminent physical assault did he desperately stammer,
“Look guys, all I do is ask!”
“What do you mean you ask?”
“Well … er … just that. I ask for what I want.”
next column …
“You mean you just come straight out and ask a girl for … ‘what you want’?”
Much guffawing from the gang … followed by,
“I’ll bet you get a heck a lot of slaps on the face!”
Knowing smiles and nods of agreement … ‘until …
“Yes, I do. But I get a lot of ‘what I want’ too!”
Sam you see may have lacked physical appeal or personal charisma but he possessed an inherent talent infinitely more powerful (and more powerful again because he was ignorant he possessed it)! … Sam was smart. He accepted that there would be slap downs but understood that life delivers just what you ask of it, no more no less.
Do you have it in you to be the smartest smoocher in town?
I am Tom Riach. I live and write in the sunny south of Portugal. I hope you enjoyed this sample of my work. Find all my current titles (novels and ‘personal achievement’) at Amazon, Barnes and Noble and other leading book stores. Click the image below.
“From every book written by Tom Riach you will gain unique insights to success, you will laugh, you will reflect upon your own character, and sometimes you will just sit in awe of his mastery of life, business and the simply written word.” – Randy Ireland, SFI Team Leader, Sulphur Springs, Arkansas
© Joseph T. Riach 1998-present. All rights reserved.
2 thoughts on “THE SMARTEST SMOOCHER IN TOWN”
Sam seems to have taken this scripture to heart “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye. shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh”
Yes indeed Graham. Much of the bible is simple ‘street wise’. And much of what’s regarded as street wise is in the bible. Biblical and street wisdom, the bread and butter of practical living, are distinctly lacking in woke dogma and much of modern society.